Blatant Attraction
by xox-mousegirl
Summary: Set right after Haunted. Suze realises she likes Paul. The Ghost of rock star, Josie Garinger, desides Suze's sex life needs help. and Jesse has a secret.
1. Be Good To Me

Disclaimer: (Is that the word? I can't remember. Oh, well) I do not own the mediator series, Meg Cabot (or Jenny Carroll) does.

Summary: Set right after Haunted. Suze admits to Paul that she _does_ like him but refuses to play tonsil hockey because she also loves Jesse. What's a girl to do??? Help the new ghost , Josie, get to her next life.

A/N: HELLO EVERYONE!!! It's me terrors!! This is my first fanfic and my head was somewhere else when I wrote this chapter, so forgive if it sucks!! It'll get better (I hope)!

Chapter one: Be good to me.

I'm in heaven. Jesse is kissing. Jesse is kissing me. And it's not just a friendly kiss on the cheek. No, no, no. There's some pretty wild tongue action too. Ok, maybe there's no tongue, Jesse is too much of a gentleman for that. But his hands are on the small of my back, way close to my butt. And, man, is Jesse a good kisser. But (and there's always a but) this thought kept coming into my head. It's very a disturbing thought, and I would do anything to not think it right now, with Jesse attached to me by our lips and all.

Paul's a better kisser.

Disturbing, right? It's not even true! Paul sucks at kissing. I definitely do not think Paul is a good kisser. Nope, not Paul with his blue eyes and rock star smile or his lips that made it so easy for me kiss him back.........

Suze! Snap out of it! We're talking about Paul Slater, spawn of the devil. Even his grandfather thinks he's evil...

Why'd Jesse pull away? Oh, to stare into my eyes. Not as good as kissing, but I can live with it. Or so I thought. I can't look at Jesse. Not after thinking about Paul while we were kissing. God, I feel like such a bitch. Jesse kissed me, and here I am wanting more, wanting _Paul. _

"Querida, what's wrong?" Oh man, how do I answer that? Should I lie? No. I'll just alter the truth a little. Just a little.

"Jesse, you're so good to me. And I don't deserve it. You were always there, to help me and to save me from those nasty, evil ghost. I know I'm not that good, but it's not like I chose to be -" he cut me off.

"Susannah," he sounded kind of mad. Why? Does he know I'm lying? Worst, does he know I was thinking about Paul? "What are you talking about?" Oh, he just doesn't understand me.

"Mediating, Jesse. I was two years old when I saw my first ghost, and I didn't know what I got myself into when I started helping them. I didn't know you then, didn't know what you would do to me." Jesse looked a bit surprised to hear that. "Querida, have I hurt you!?" I shook my head. "Of course not! Jesse, I was talking about how I fell for you. Jesse I love you." Whoa, did I just say that? I just told Jesse that I loved him. He looks kind of surprised, surprised but happy. "You've just been so good to me." Wow, I'm good. I just didn't want Jesse to get mad at me, but now he's kissing me again. This time with tongues.

We stayed like that for a bit. Kissing, and sometimes talking. And I hardly thought about Rosemary's baby (aka Paul). After a while Jesse told me that I should go back. "Ceecee will be looking for you." And he disappeared. Poof! Well not "Poof", he just kind of faded away. I stayed there staring at the foot of the hill, starring at Jesse's grave. And I realized something, Jesse didn't say "I love you" back.

When I got back to the booth Ceecee was there, smiling like crazy. When I sat down beside her she asked, "So is Jesse a good kisser?" The look I gave her just then was a mix of shock, horror and fear. Then I remembered our conversation from earlier.

"Ceecee, I thought that you thought that Jesse was a ghost. How would I know if a ghost is a good kisser or not, you can't kiss a ghost." But Ceecee just shook her head.

"Suze, I saw you in the cemetery talking to someone I couldn't see. I heard you say 'Jesse' a few times then make out with the air. So either Jesse's a ghost, or you're crazy. Which one is it?" No wonder she works for the newspaper. She'll make an awesome journalist one day. (a/n is it journalist that work for the paper? I forget)

"I was there to pay respect to a friend of mine who died recently, Cee. His name was Hector but I called him Jesse. He's buried there." And I'll make a good lawyer (a/n is that how you spell it?), never telling the truth but never lying either.

But, as always, Ceecee is too cleaver for me. "Oh, you mean Hector De Silva who died in 1850? That's over 150 years ago, Simon, how could you know him, unless he's a ghost?"

So I told her, what would you have done? She was so happy that she was right and not crazy. She said it explain a lot about me. Am I really that weird? She swore she wouldn't tell anyone but she'll end up telling Adam. I told her about everything. Well, almost. I didn't tell her that Paul Slater is a shifter like me. Or that that Paul kissed me. And that I liked it.

(A/N so there it is. The first chapter. Sorry it's so short. But hey, what can you do?)


	2. Josie

Disclaimer: (Is that the word? I can't remember. Oh, well) I do not own the mediator series, Meg Cabot (or Jenny Carroll) does. I do however own Josie Garinger. So there! (Sticks tongue out) Actually Josie is based on a song by The Harlots. The song is called "Josie". And Garinger is the last name of the singer, the guitarist, and the bassist of the band. So they get credit also. (any Harlots/Ballroom Zombie fans out there!?)

Summary: Set right after Haunted. Suze admits to Paul that she _does_ like him but refuses to play tonsil hockey because she also loves Jesse. What's a girl to do??? Help the new ghost, Josie, of course!

A/N: WOOHOO! I GOT THREE WHOLE REVIEWS!! (Never mind that one of them was me) (Terrors starts to dance to MC Hammer's 'Can't touch this') nananananananana CAN'T TOUCH THIS!!! nananananana

Chapter 2: Josie

Surprisingly, no one was home when I got there. Well, the dog and Spike were there, but they don't count, do they? The house was clean so I'm guessing Dopey had a busy night. I grabbed a Dr. Pepper from the fridge and headed up to my room; glad for once that I wouldn't be disturbed.

Jesse wasn't there and I was fine with that, I needed to do some serious thinking. I sat on my window seat, ignoring the hissing spike, and took a swing of my beverage. "What am I going to do?" I asked spike. He just looked at me like I was crazy. I guess I was. I had a hot latino ghost willing to do whatever I wanted and I was thinking of the guy who forces himself on me. In normal circumstances, Jesse is the ideal choice for a boyfriend, but this is not normal circumstances. Jesse is dead, he died way before I was born. Only a three people that I knew of could see him. Me (who wants to kiss him till he explodes), Father Dom (who neither wishes that I kiss him, or that he explodes) and Paul (whom I'm guess would love to see Jesse explode. But wouldn't be too excited to see me kissing Jesse).

Paul, on the other hand, can be seen be many people. But he is evil. He tried to kill me (no matter how many times he denies this, it's true). He helped Maria to get Jesse exorcised and he forced himself onto me. So what if I liked it, he should respect the fact that I'm dedicated to Jesse. He also totally trashed my house, getting me grounded.

Tough decision, huh?

If only Jesse were alive. Wait, no, then he would be 170 year old man. Ew.

When I thought this I started to cry, I don't know why, but I did. I guess it's because I know it will never work out between Jesse and me. Never. I saw a twinkle of lights, then a glowing form. Oh, god. Just what I need. Jesse's gonna ask me what's wrong then I'll have to lie to him again. "Jesse, I can't talk to you now..." I said without looking at him.

"Jesse?" said an undeniably female voice, "No, no, hunny bunny, I'm J_osie_, not _Jesse_. But if you want me to leave..."

I looked up and saw a girl maybe a year or two older then me. Her black hair was in dreads that shot up straight from her head. And her gray eyes(which were surrounded by heavy black eyeliner) looked kinda sad though she had a smile on her face. She also had the glow, signaling her ghostliness. She looked kind of familiar but she definitely didn't come from Carmel. Girls here don't wear combat boots, baggy black pants or corsets, all of which she was wearing. And people here definitely don't wear dog collars. I must have seen her in New York.

Though she implied that she would leave she didn't. So I invited her to sit besides me. "So, I'm assuming you came here looking for the mediator. Well, that's me. So let's get down to business, shall we? Now, Josie, care to tell me how you died?" Even though I didn't feel like mediating right now, I had to. It was my job (even though there's no pay). She could obviously tell that there was something wrong with me (could it be the tears streaming down my face?) because she was looking at me like I was crazy (doesn't everyone?)

"Listen, you obviously need a shoulder to cry on. I, on the other hand, don't. I'm perfectly fine being dead. It's really quite fun. Now umm, sorry what's your name?" Nuh uh this isn't how it works, I'm supposed to be helping her not the other way around.

"Suze Simon. And really, I'm fine. I'm a mediator, I help ghost go wherever they're supposed to go. Now tell me, how can I help _you_?" She rolled her eyes at me in a "fine whatever" way and flopped down on my bed. She looked around and noticed my CDs (which scattered across the floor, thanks to Jesse), and made a disgusted face. She clearly was not going to say anything. "Why did you come here if don't want help huh Josie? I've got some stuff I need to figure out and-"

"I came here because I wanted to be with someone who could see me." She said that like it was the most obvious thing in the world. "and just because you're a mediator, whatever that is, it doesn't mean that you have to forget about all your problems for someone who's dead. Just because people _think_ I'm someone who'll kick your ass if you don't worship the ground I walk on doesn't mean that I _will_. God! Whenever people see me they're like 'Oh, look there's Josie Garinger, better be careful or she'll throw her sixty thousand dollar guitar at you'. I am so not like that! This isn't even how I like to dress! This top is a pain and I hate putting on so much make up! I mean who does that..." Whoa, spaz alert. Maybe, if I walk away slowly she won't notice...

Hold the phone! Who did she say she was?

"Y-you're Josie Garinger!?" To say she looked surprised is an understatement. Like how could I not have recognized her? She nodded her head, giving me another 'Suze Simon is crazy' looks. Like I don't get those enough. "Wait, I didn't know that you died?"

Yet again, I receive the crazy look. "Where have you been, Simon? It's all over the news! They're saying I'm new-" She didn't have time to finish before I rush out of my room, and ran to the kitchen, where the morning paper was. I lunged at it. And there was Josie's face staring up at me from the front page.

**Josie Garinger: 21st Century Kurt Cobain?**

**Josie Garinger, lead singer of popular rock band 'Blatant Attraction", was found dead early yesterday morning by band members. Autopsies** (a/n is that the word where people exam dead bodies to find out how they die?) **show that Josie had taken a few too many painkillers. Her agent says, "She broke her arm and was only trying to relieve the pain. Silly girl didn't realize how many she took." But according to her online diary she was miserable and wanted to end it all. "My agent is always telling me who I am. How the hell is he supposed to know that? He's always telling me what to wear and what to say. He won't let me be myself." Is what she says of her agent.**

**According to rumors Jason Philip, her agent, has been trying to delete that entry but that "silly girl", as he put it, changed all the passwords to her online Journal, making it impossible for him to do anything............**

Josie had entered the kitchen and was looking through the fridge, for reasons unknown to me (the girl can't eat, she's dead). "You killed yourself?" I asked, shocked. But she appeared not to have heard me and without turning around said in a thoughtful voice, "Maybe you _can_ help me Suze. They're comparing me to Kurt Cobain, which I admit is flattering but it made me realize something. Suze, you know what happened when Kurt shot himself?" She turned around and I shook my head. Her sad eyes even sadder now, and her smile gone completely. "His fans, Suze, when he k-killed himself, his fans did the same. Not all of them, but enough of them. What happens if mine do the same? Monkey see, Monkey do, ya know?"

"Do you think you're fans would really do that?" Okay, I'm freaked out. I'm imagining a bunch of teenaged girls all stabbing themselves to Blatant Attraction's first single 'Barren Soul' (sample lyrics: Can't sleep with demons in my dreams/can't fly when the air keeps me down/cuz my soul is empty/you made me a barren soul)(a/n I never said I was a good song writer). It was freaking me out. Who would do that?

"Yeah. They was always following me and giving me gifts and saying 'you're the only thing that keeps me alive.'" She thought for a moment. "I know! You just go to my online journal and pretend that you're me and say that I don't want any of them killing themselves because of me and just mark it to an hour before I died!" I said ok, got the password for her online Journal and did what she said. It can't stop those who are already in ghost form but Josie seemed happy. "So, Suzie," she sang happily, "tell me, why were you crying before?"

I don't know what's wrong with me today but it seems that I'm trusting people with my secrets. Yup, that right I told her about the Jesse/Paul problem, though she didn't think it was, a Problem I mean. She shook her head at me with the 'Suze equals crazy' look, yet _again_, and said, "Suze, really, if you don't know the answer already then I don't know what to say." And with that she disappeared. A second later the phone rang and of course I answered it because it's what you do when phones ring, ya know? But I probably wouldn't have if I knew who it was.

"Suze," said Paul Slater's too familiar voice. "I'm picking you up at 1:00 tomorrow. We have shifting lessons" And he hung up. I guess he thought I would try to get out of it. But I wouldn't, I have Jesse to think of.

(A/N And there you have chapter two! It's getting better, right? 'Yup, uhhuh Miss Terrors, Lots better!!!' Said the little leprechaun in the blue dress. 'Hey little Leprechaun! Don't steal my pepsi! Noooooooo!!! My Pepsi!!!!' leprechaun takes sip and spits it out 'yuch, it's diet!' leprechaun runs away Review if you know whats good for you!!!! deadly-terrors Haunting your dreams )


	3. The Bad Touch

Disclaimer: That's right, I don't own anything Mediator. Meg Does. Though I would like to "borrow" Paulie, if ya know what I mean...I also only partially own Josie. Though I do own J.T. She should be coming in this chapter, I think. I'm naming her after me(J.T are my initials to my first name, I have one of those double first, ya know, like Mary-Kate, only without the hyphen(-)).

Summary: Set right after Haunted. Suze admits to Paul that she _does_ like him but refuses to play tonsil hockey because she also loves Jesse. What's a girl to do??? Help the new ghost, Josie, of course!

A/N: Am I a Paul fan or a Jesse fan, you ask (no one really did ask me this but I feel like talking about myself at the moment.) I am in fact A Paul fan. I have a thing for "bad guys". Though I do think it would be wrong if Suze stopped loving Jesse. Therefore I do not know whether this will be a p/s or a j/s. Actually I do know the ending already. You might not expect it. It's a bit different from most endings you get here I think, well it's different then the ones I've read. Hey look, I wanted to talk about my self and I ended up talking about the story! Meh, watcha gonna do.

**Chapter 3: The bad touch** (personally I love this song. You know by The Bloodhound Gang. But all my friends hate it and think I'm crazy)

When I woke up on Sunday I fully expected that I would have to sneak out to go with Paul. Turns out, though, that Mom and Andy were going to some lunch party. So as soon as Paul's convertible I walked right at the front door (wearing comfortable running shoes) instead of climbing out my window. Turns out this was the wrong choice of exits considering Dopey popped out of nowhere and said, "Your mom is so gonna hear about this."

Unfortunately, the worst thing Dopey has done lately is that party and has already been grounded for that, so I had nothing on him. Dopey knew this too. So I just stood there, looking like a fish (with really nice hair, I might add) until Paul walked up behind me and said to Dopey: "Brad, let Suze come with me or I'll tell everyone what you and the freshman girl were doing." Dopey went bright red and ran back upstairs. He was clearly not going to tell Mom about me leaving the house while grounded, with one of the reasons that I am, grounded I mean. Without a word to Paul I walked up to the car and jumped in, ignoring the door (it was a convertible, after all). Paul followed me back to the car and I was off to Paul's house (and possibly more kisses. Not that I want them. Okay, maybe I do, so sue me.)

"Aren't you gonna ask me what Brad and that freshman were doing?" Paul asked me as we pulled out. I answered that with a blunt "no" but Paul seemed to take it as a "Please Paul, tell me what my dopey step-brother was doing with some fourteen year old. I'm dying to know about his sex life!" So he told me that he found Brad and Mel, the freshie, making out half naked in an empty classroom. I mean, do I even care? Paul seemed to realize that I wasn't participating in our conversation after a while and started to twirl some of my hair with his finger and said, very seductively I might add, into my ear, "Suze, what are you mad at me for this time? I said I wouldn't hurt Jesse and I was able to get you out of your house, so what is it? Wait, did I try to kill you again?"

Ok, now he was making fun at me. The Nerve! I Turn to face him to spit at witty comeback at him but I kind of got trapped in his eyes... They were very nice. A very light blue, and exactly the same shade as the sky. Paul noticed I had a trapped-in-a-hottie's-eyes-though-I-shouldn't-even-be-near-him-or-else-my-dead-borfriend-will-kick-his-ass-not-to-mention-he's-closly-related-to-satan look so he turned off his car (we were already at his house) and leaned forward so we were nose-to-nose.

"Did I try to kill you again, Suze?" He purred. And with that I found myself attached to Paul by our lips. Why oh why does Paul have to be so sexy? Why couldn't he be more like Brad? Or someone else with an equal amount of sex appeal (aka none). And why do I like him so much? I have Jesse. Never mind that he never showed up last night when I got home. But still Jesse lov....... Jesse who?

The kiss seemed to be doing some damage to my brain so I pulled away. Paul reluctantly did the same. Paul was, and so was I, breathing heavily. Though, unlike me, Paul was smiling. In fact, I was doing quite the opposite. I was close to tears. Paul noticed and grabbed my hand, not really in a romantic way though. I think he just wanted to make sure I didn't running away and get my feet messed up again. My hero. (Sarcasm people!)

"Look, Suze, I shouldn't have done that," What was this? Is Paul being nice? Unfortunately he continued, "until we got inside. I couldn't help myself-" he caught my dirty look and quickly changed what he was saying. "I mean, Suze, I'm sorry. You're just so....so beautiful. It's hard to keep my hands to myself."

I might have found this flattering if I still weren't thinking about the _real_ reason I was upset. I didn't really care that Paul kissed me, it was a wonderful kiss. It's just that I figured out _why_ I liked Paul's smooches better the Jesse's.

"Cinnamon," I whispered to myself.

"Huh?" Was all I got from Paul.

I wasn't going to say anything else. I was just going to walk into the house and forget about it. _Burn the thought out of my mind_. But it turns out I didn't need to explain myself. Someone else would.

"What's she's trying to say is that you taste like cinnamon. And that bothers her because she's used to kissing people who don't chew cinnamon flavored gum. And even if they he did, she wouldn't be able to taste it because a ghost's breath doesn't smell like anything, partly because they don't have one, a breath I am." A ghostly hand appeared from the backseat. "I'm Josie Garinger. Who are you?" She asked Paul.

"Paul, Paul Slater. Oh, so I taste good, that's what she's trying to say? Wait, you're the singer chick, right?" Paul started to hum the chorus of one of her songs "Hmmmmhmhmmmhmhmmmmmmm."

Josie ignored the humming and looked at me with wide eyes. "Is this the Paul that you like but won't admit it because of that ghost? I really don't understand you, Simon, this guy is a total _babe_!" Unfortunately, Paul heard this and immediately stopped humming

"You like me Suze?" he said, a smile playing at his lips. I ignored him and headed towards the house, giving Josie the evil eye. I hade to wait for Paul at the door but when he got there he made no move to open it. "Come on, Suze. If you ignoring me is a plan to get me to stop loving you, then you can forget about it. It just makes me horny."

Did I slip into another dimension? Paul said he loved me, well kinda. But it's closer then anything Jesse ever said. Did Jesse really love me, or were those kisses because he hadn't been with anyone in 150 years? No, nobody could kiss like he did and not mean it. (a/n isn't that line overused or what?)

I blame my state of confusion for what I did next, which was grab Paul's head and roughly pull it towards mine. Paul wasn't expecting that and it took him a while for him to register what was happening. Once he did though, whoa. This kiss was WAY better then that time in his room. This one was soft and sweet, something I would never have expected from him. I loosened my grip from Paul's head and let my hands like down his toned chest to his hips. I wrapped my arms around him and pulled his torso closer to mine. Suddenly are kissed changed, we were no longer savoring each other but fulfilling a craving. I was up against the door (with the doorknob painfully pushing into my back) and Paul attacked my neck. I was grateful that Josie was polite enough to dematerialize. Though I enjoyed the effect of Paul's lips on my neck I brought his head so it was leveled with mine and we stared at each other.

It seemed like years later when Josie returned. We were still standing in front of his house. I had my head on his shoulders, squeezing his middle like he was a squeezing thing. Paul was running a finger down the side of my arm ever so gently. I could barely feel it but it sent shivers down my spine. The touch made me want to spend the rest of my life with Paul, in his arms. It was a touch that made me forget about everything, including Jesse. Therefore, it was a bad touch.

Josie obviously didn't care for the serenity of the moment and went, really loudly might I add, "Awwwwwwww. You guys make the most _awesome _couple!" That seemed to snap me back to reality. I pulled away from my embracer and slide to the ground, saying whatever came to my mind, which was; "ohmygodofmyfreakinggodcan'tbelievejessefreakholymotherofpaulohgod!" Paul for once was absolutely quiet. He just unlocked the door and let himself in, leaving Josie and me out side. He came back to the door a moment later, still dazed and picked my up and bringing me to his room. He dropped me on my bed (a lot gentler then Jesse did when I messed up my feet) and sat on the floor besides the bed. Josie settled down across from Paul, also on the ground. Josie spoke after a minute or so.

"I'm sorry to break up your incoherent ramblings, Suze, but I've got a problem. Some of my fans have found me, the dead ones, I mean. They've been following me all day, that's why I came to you in the car, but Mr. Sex God here distracted me though." She winked at Paul who was still uncharacteristically silent. "They should be here any moment now."

Like if on cue, a ghostly glow came into the room. It belonged to a girl, maybe a year younger then me. She had olive skin with brown eyes framed with what Gina calls "emo-glasses". Her hair was blond (obviously bleached because there was an inch of brown roots showing). I knew that she was here for Josie because of her t-shirt that had "Blatant Attraction" scribbled across a picture of Josie. She caught me staring and said "you can see me?" I nodded. "ya, I'm Suze Simon, a mediator, and that's Paul." I motion to Paul then added, "he can see you too." It didn't look like he could though. He was just staring of into space, not really seeing anything. So it made all of us jump when he spoke.

"Shifters, Simon, we're shifters. We're more then common mediators." Huh. Whatever, that not really important now, I thought as the new ghost gave me as "what's with him" look.

"I'm J.T. Uh, Suze, right?" I nodded. She was on of the few people who got that my name is 'Suze'. Not Susie. Not Susan. Suze."Well, your lip gloss is, like, all over your face." Well, she's very observant one, that J.T.

As I wiped off my lippy another ghost arrived and ran up and gave Josie a hug. I didn't see her face but Paul did.

"Kelly!?" The ghost turned around. And there, my friends, was the Junior class president, Kelly Prescott, in all her ghostliness.

(Well there you have it folks! Chapter 3! What will Suze do about Paul? Will Jesse find out? Why won't Josie move on? How does J.T fit into the story? And YAY!!! Kelly is dead!!!!!)


	4. Rapid Hope Loss

Disclaimer: You know I don't own anything Mediator. I also don't own any of the chapter titles (I named them after my favorite songs, just so ya know) I do however own "Blatant Attraction" The band. Except for maybe Josie. I'm a little confused with this whole disclaimer thing. I also own J.T. because SHE IS I!!! Well not really. I would never kill myself, let alone do it because someone I never even met did it. Though a few months ago I was ito the whole suicide thing. I'm completely over it now. It was stupid, it wasn't me. I'm too happy. Okay as I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted by, um...me. J.T is just based on me, she is not really me. I would never do some of the stuff I plan for her to do. But then again, I would do some of it too. Wow this is a long disclaimer.

Summary: oh come on, you've read three chapters, I think you'd know what it's about!!!

A/N: Okay before I start blabbing about myself again (I really am conceded aren't I?) I would like to thank all my reviewers!! Sweetest reject, pens in potatoes, Lola, teen-princess, roomate153 and myself (yes I reviewed my self, got a problem with that?). And also a big thanks to Sunny Dragoness, who is the only one who has reviewed my poem, Shadow. (Even though she didn't read the book). Yes I'm trying to guilt you into reading it! I want to know whether it is bad or not.

I don't really feel like rambling any more, I think I did enough of it in the disclaimer. So enjoy chapter 4! (it is four right?) oh ya. You know from "Shadowland" the ghost that tried to bury Suze alive with the Mission's roof? Kelly's friend? Her name was Heather right? Well, I forget so her name is Heather in this.

Oh ya, for the last chapter sorry there were so many mistakes! It was like 3 am when I wrote it and I was too tired to proofread and edit it. I fixed most of them though, so it should be good.

Chapter 4: Rapid Hope Loss

Okay, I was surprised. More then surprised, I was freaked out. Even more so then realizing what I had done with Paul, which is saying a lot.

"P-paul, Simon, you can see me!? How..." She looked between Paul and I then she looked at Josie, whom, it seemed, she was already acquainted with. "Jose, how can they see me?"

"They can see me and J.T. too, you know. You're not that special." Ah, good ol' Josie. I knew we had a lot in common. You know a disliking the same person can bring people closer together. "They're mediators, they can see all ghost." She answered Kelly's question, while rolling her eyes.

"Oh, that would explain why they're such freaks." Retorted Kelly, obviously undisturbed by Josie's hatred. Paul didn't seem hurt by Kelly's remark. Well, why would he? I've called him way worse. And he obviously wasn't going to do anything. I, on the other hand, was going to do something.

"Uh huh. Well, Kelly I'm your only way off this world, cuz Paul doesn't do charity cases and there's no other mediators around." Accidentally-on-purpose forgetting about Father D. "And really don't want you around. So either you can make it easy for all of us, and tell me what's holding you back. Or, if you refuse to cooperate, I could always exorcise you like I did with Heather." I gave her a meaningful glance. Paul and Josie, who don't know about Heather, were looking at me like they thinking 'are you trying to make her angry, cuz I don't think that's gonna work'. J.T could really care less about Kelly or me. She was off staring, not at Josie as one would think, but at the door. But since I was too busy waiting for Kelly's reaction, I didn't bother looking at the door, which was behind me.

Since Heather was Kelly's best friend when she was alive I had obviously found a sore spot. "You did _what_ to Heather?" She practically screeched in my face. "You exorcised Heather!? How dare you, you _bitch!!!!_" And then she slapped me. To give her some credit I don't think she expected it to hurt me. She probably just thought her hand would go right through me, like in movies and stuff.

I touched my cheek softly, man did that hurt. Paul looked up at Kelly and told her: "You shouldn't have done that. Suze hits back, and hard." But Kelly just laughed, like she didn't believe I would dare hit her. Well, she soon found out that I would, hit her back I mean.

But when I started slamming my fist into Kelly's face and vair familiar voice shouted "Susannah!" and felt myself being pulled away from Kelly. I was truned around and found myself face to face with Jesse.

"Oh hey Jesse. I'm in the middle of something now so could you please let go of me?" but he just shook his head. Kelly, looking scared, just dematerialized. "Great, now she's gone. How am I supposed to bring her to Shadowland now?"

He ignored that he seemed angry. "What are you doing with that (insert Spanish here)" he indicated Paul.

"Hey Jesse. How's it going?" Guess Paul was taking our deal seriously. I come over so he can teach me shifter stuff and he acts nice to Jesse. Jesse was surprised. He just gaped at Paul. I hope he didn't know about me making out with Paul. Oh god.

"That's Jesse!? Suze, wow. Too mega studs fighting over you. Tch! Some girls get all the fun." Josie sat besides Paul and started to whisper him. He whispered something back. What were they talking about? But I had bigger things to deal with.

"Uh, Jesse, how long have you been here?"

"Not long." Phew! So he doesn't know about Paul and me. Good. He turned to J.T. I thought she had left. But no, she was still staring at. "Jacqueline..." What!? He knew her? How?

"No, I'm J.T, her great-great-great-granddaughter. But I've seen pictures of you. I've seen your letters too. They're romantic. I have the ring you gave her too, Hector, it's a family heirloom." With that she shoved her hand at Jesse. There was the most beautiful ring I have ever seen. The band was silver and made to look like it had thorns on it. There was a sparkling ruby, too. It was shaped like a rose. "My mother tells Jacqueline's story to me sometimes. How you and her were madly in love. But you were betrothed already to your cousin. You promised you'd break off the wedding, but you disappeared. She thought you married Maria. She was heart broken, Hector. What happened?"

Jesse looked uncomfortable. Well everyone in the room was looking at him. J.T. expectantly. And the rest of us in shock. Though Paul had a bit of triumph in his gaze.

Jesse didn't say anything. He looked at me, then J.T. then Paul, then back to me. It was completely silent. I couldn't take it anymore.

"Jesse what is she talking about." I kept my voice neutral. "No, never mind. I get it now. That's why you why Maria killed you, because you were going to marry someone else. You must have really loved her to risk your life for her." I tried to look him in the eyes but he wouldn't look at me.

J.T. realizing what she had done looked around and said: "I think I left the stove on, I, er, should go, and you know, turn it off." And she left. After a few more minutes of silence Jesse looked at me. "Querida...." I stopped him.

"Don't call me that. I was never your querida. That _Jacqueline_" I said her name like she was a man-eating virus. Actually, I said it how I used to say Paul's. "was. I thought you loved me, Jesse. I guess I was wrong. I was just someone to play with until you were with your precious girlfriend in heaven." No matter how much I hated Jesse right now I knew he was going to heaven. Even though my heart was shattered to tiny little bit-size peaces, I knew he was going to Heaven. "But Jesse, I love you." And with that, I touched his arm, and pictured the Shadowland.

The mist lick at my legs, and the stars winked at me. The hallway went on forever, with those doors. Even though I have been here before, I was still scared shitless.

"Susannah," Jesse took my face in his hands, forcing me to face him. "Querida. I do love you. I do." He kissed me. Knowing that this was our last kiss ever I didn't pull away. The kiss lasted for eternity, it seemed like. And it felt like we were melting together, becoming one. I felt tears. They weren't mine, they were Jesse's.

"Querida, I'm sorry. Forgive me."

"Yes, I forgive you. Goodbye Jesse." I pictured Paul's bedroom. I thought heard Jesse say "Goodbye my love." But by then I was already back in my body, crying. I looked around the cold, impersonal room. Paul was gone, but Josie wasn't. "Oh Suze!" she yelled and then I found myself in her arms. I realized that she was right. People, even me, look at her and immediately think she'd kick our ass. But she's really nice. "Suze, don't worry, the pain will go away someday."

Paul came back holding a tub of Ben and Jerry's and three spoons. "I got some ice cream. I hear girls consume it by the tonne after a breakup." And sat besides me, giving each of us a spoon. Paul didn't seem in tip-top shape either as he took a spoonful in chocolate chip ice cream. But I guess I understand. Hearing the girl you love say that she loves a dead guy probably doesn't leave the best feeling.

"Paul, I'm so sorry." But all I got was a sad smile.

A/N: there you go! I hope you liked it! I just completely wrecked my plan for the story but I like this better. Though I don't know how it will end now......


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